Starting Over

It's a sad story... but could have been worse.
Reading back on the previous posts make me realize that I have lost touch of the true Passion that I have once had.
It must be a combination of losing Focus, Laziness, and Fear.
My BR have dwindled down to $1454.30. Most of this is due to Cash-Outs, so I can't say I lost a whole lot, just didn't win.
In the past few months I've come up with so many different "projects" that didn't work.
I don't really know what I am going to do next, but I've got to do something.
The first thing I have to do is to reflect on things and find the passion that had once driven me to turn a $110 BR into what it has become today. I will post later tonight with a new plan once I have figured things out.

...Misreading a hand... my Own Hand

PokerStars Game #8263659246: Hold'em No Limit ($0.50/$1.00) - 2007/02/03 - 16:48:46 (ET)
Table 'Georgia II' 6-max Seat #6 is the button
Seat 1: pnoles ($100.50 in chips)
Seat 2: HardCoreBO ($111.70 in chips)
Seat 3: Rexme ($70.45 in chips)
Seat 4: sting3693 ($55.15 in chips)
Seat 5: stoffe_85 ($59.70 in chips)
Seat 6: tapaniäö ($74.70 in chips)
pnoles: posts small blind $0.50
HardCoreBO: posts big blind $1
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to HardCoreBO [Ac Qs]
Rexme: folds
sting3693: raises $3 to $4
stoffe_85: folds
tapaniäö: calls $4
pnoles: folds
HardCoreBO: calls $3
*** FLOP *** [6s Ks Jh]
HardCoreBO: checks
sting3693: bets $11
tapaniäö: calls $11
HardCoreBO: calls $11
*** TURN *** [6s Ks Jh] [7h]
HardCoreBO: checks
sting3693: bets $40.15 and is all-in
tapaniäö: calls $40.15
HardCoreBO: calls $40.15
*** RIVER *** [6s Ks Jh 7h] [4s]
HardCoreBO: bets $36
tapaniäö: calls $19.55 and is all-in
*** SHOW DOWN ***
HardCoreBO: shows [Ac Qs] (high card Ace)
tapaniäö: shows [8s 9s] (a flush, King high)
tapaniäö collected $39.10 from side pot
sting3693: mucks hand
tapaniäö collected $162.95 from main pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $205.05 Main pot $162.95. Side pot $39.10. Rake $3
Board [6s Ks Jh 7h 4s]
Seat 1: pnoles (small blind) folded before Flop
Seat 2: HardCoreBO (big blind) showed [Ac Qs] and lost with high card Ace
Seat 3: Rexme folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 4: sting3693 mucked [Ad As]
Seat 5: stoffe_85 folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 6: tapaniäö (button) showed [8s 9s] and won ($202.05) with a flush, King high

I call the flop with the intention of folding if I dont hit my flush... on the turn sicne the guy in the middle call I rigured I barely had odds to call so I gambled... On the river my flush hits of course I push all in to take the poor sucker for anything he got left.... he calls...and we flip our cards... the chips go towards him! there's no straight flush!?? How can this be? I have the nut flush!!!... oh SHIT***#%@@#! its a Spade and a CLUB! I have Ace high!!! LoL

6k in 100d: Day7?

I skipped playign poker so much this week its not even funny.
But i figured since it's the beginning of the new month I should try to play more to get silverstar or goldstar fpps. btw i missed gettign goldstar last month... i suck.

Session1: .5H made about 120. BR at this point is 3377.80

$6K in 100D: Day3

I have not been playing any Poker since the last post, so I'm only going to count today as day 3. But from now on every calendar day is going to count towards my goal. Realistically I dont think I can even play 2 hours a day on weekedays... Work is really stressful and I just dont have the mental energy to do it. I'll shoot for about an hour a day.

Here are today's results
Session1: 2 Hour (.5/1 NL) +50
Session2: 1 Hour (3 SNGs) -12 Lost Lost 2nd

I'm starting to notice a leak in my game... I was involved in a pot today: HAd AK bet 3 got reraised by a loose agressive player to about 10. I call. Flop comes TTJ I fire 14 bucks he cold calls...
Turn comes a blank... I put him on a Jack and no ten (ten would raise the flop for value, overpair woulda raised to know where he's at)... or maybe he may have even had AQ or AK himself, drawing... So I go all in for about 55 more... (I dont think i sold this bluff well... I didnt hesitate long enough)
This play in theory is the right play considering my read is correct... however in cash games... the risk/reward is not favorable for a bluffer (on big pots) at all.
The guy calls with J9...
Now I'm not going to dog him for making this call.. he may have had a read... but then this call loses money at least half of the time... so it's fair to say that that was a loose call on his part.

Still a bluff with 50/50 chance of success is not a good bluff... considering if the guy calls I lose 50+ more and if he folds I win whatever the pot is ... aobut 50 at this point.
In this case my read was right... and I did have the AKQ as outs (10 outs) ... but still it was not a good bluff. I got stacked that hand for about 100 chips when the river came blank.. thats about all my profit for the first session... and really i did it to myself.
Oftentimes I put a guy on a hand that is not even close to the best, so I represent the better hand expecting him to fold... but everyone is different, and some people are not going to make the laydown.... and I've lost a lot of big pots this way. Thus- this is a leak in my game.

$6K in 100D: Day2

Sunday... back to the grinding board =)

Session 1 (.25/.50NL): 1.5H +49
This was a Tough session had dry cards all the way until the end when I had a short rush of cards.

I was too tired and out of it today... never got around to starting my second session... Colts/Patriots game wore me out! Go Manning!

Pokerstars BR: 3229
Net Change: +139 (6H)
I still Need: 5861

$6K in 100D: Day1

I am starting this project today, on a Saturday. Going to try to to play at least a few sessions today... moving downstakes until I get to about 5000 overall BR.

Session 1 (.25/.50): 1.5 H +93
Session 2 (.25/.50 + .50/1) 3H -3


Pokerstars BR: 3190
Net Change: +90 (4.5H)
I still need : 5910

The second session was horrible... I was down the whole time and took forever to come back and break even. Overall I should have played more than I did (a third session). But at least I didn't end in the negative. I plan to play at least 4-5 hours on Sunday.

The Second Great Project: $6000 in 100 Days

Today is Monday January 15, 2007. I just woke up from a much needed sleep after a regretable night wheen I was donking away $300 in cash at commerce casino. And I have to admit this time I had noone else to blame except for myself. I was playign solid poker from about 10pm to 5:30AM... I was up about 100 at one point... then ran into a cold stretch of cards... got impatient ... then fucked myself over to make a story short... calling with second best hands donating my chips away.
This is a form of tilt I havent had much experience with. Playing Casino Poker definitely takes a toll on you becasue you are only playign one table and the action is soo slow... you get bored and careless at one point... as I did.
So as usual, I am determined to bounce back...

I must keep reminding myself that I can definitely beat this game, at least at the lower limits. I just need to dedicate the time and energy and keep myself motivated.

I cashed out another 400 from neteller to make up for my live game losses. I am not going to return to the casino until I accomplish this new goal. Make $6000 in 100 Days Playing Online Poker.

I readjusted my Pokerstars BR. It is standing firmly at $3000. By the time this project is over I expect to have a $6000 BR and $3000 of Reserves in Neteller.
The plan:
I am going to Dedicate at minimal amount of Hours of playtime to Poker per week... 2 hours for mon/tues/wed/thurs and 5 hours per friday/saturday/sunday.
This does not mean I have to play excactly 2 hours or five hours on those days. But by the end of the week (sunday night) I must have played for at least 23 hours.
If it takes me the full 100 days playing at this rate, then I would have made about $18.25 per hour, straight up! No Tax to uncle faggot Sam.
More importantly, the higher BR will give me great leverage for trying to move up limits which I really need to do sometime later this year ($200Max).

For now I am mostly going to 4 table shorthanded cash games at the 50max and 100max buy ins on Stars. I'm just gonna grind this day in and day out.... I mean this is it if I can't prove to myself that I can make a profit out of this game then Poker is not worth my time anymore.

This is a VERY important project in my mind. Poker has definitely evolved. The game is now harder, players are much better. A lot of casual players have left the game behind. Many have gone broke or cashed out and given up all together.
For me, I am still trying to keep the dream alive. But since I work now, I really have to make that extra effort. I have been slowly losing over the past 2 months. Overall I would say I am down about a grand. But I made this much in the two weeks prior to that.
Again, right now I just want to look foward. I am playing with a $3000 pure Poker Bankroll (all profit money). In this sense I have nothing to lose. I am going to be fearless this time. I shall not be denied! I shall succeed!